Race day debrief. In one word, “awesome.” In many words….read on!
I spent Saturday drinking as much water as possible, staying off my feet, and eating specific meals; I had my race gear laid out and my bib pinned on my shirt before lunch time. In bed by 10pm. Oh, and a short run in the a.m. just to loosen up and stretch.
I woke up on Sunday morning shortly after 6am, and turned on the stove to get my oatmeal cooking. I wasn’t nervous – the kind of nervous where my stomach sickeningly flip-flops and my legs feel weak; I was simply excited. The weather was overcast and cool – perfect running weather!
My running buddy picked me up and we drove to the race site; Mark was going to meet up with us on his bike. I was glad to have my buddy’s company, and could share our excitement. We checked our bags at the Bag Check, did some warm up stretches, and then made our way to the starting area. The start area was packed, but we found our respective corral area – I was in the 1:45 finish-time corral.
Ten minutes until start time. A few final stretches. Check my laces one last time. Tighten my water belt again. One minute until start time. We move up to the start line. The elite athletes are at the front. The gun goes off. About 9,000 runners cheer and clap. Off I go!
I got a nasty side-stitch right off the bat, which lasted for about 5 kilometers, but thankfully it eventually disappeared. I spotted Mark near the War Museum, and he got a couple of photos. I stayed by the edge of the road and he cycled beside me for a little ways; that was fun. The Quebec portion of the route was uphill and downhill, and passed in a blur.
Approaching the 10 kilometer marker. Hundreds of running shoes smacking the pavement around me; the sound is wonderful. Passing the Museum of Civilization; approaching the Alexandria Bridge. I spot Mark again and he captures a few photos. On the Alexandria Bridge, I vaguely note the Peace Tower clock reads 9:15am; I have been running for 45 minutes. I am tired already, and remind myself to keep drinking my gel.
Keep going, almost half way, drink! Keep going, almost half way, drink!
The more the fatigue sets in, the more fluids I drink. My water bottles are emptied sooner than I expected; I was so anxious about not hitting the wall that my anxiety spurred me on to keep drinking. In training, I always forgot to drink. Luckily I still have my large water bottle filled with water with me, rubbing against my back and, as I later learned, leaving a raw sore spot.
Around the half way mark, I began to slow down at the water stations for about 40 seconds for a short recovery. As the race wore on, I began to anticipate the water stations with a growing sense of urgency! That was a lesson worth nothing – following the concept of the RR’s 10 and 1s (run 10 min, walk 1 min), I did an active recovery jog for 40 seconds (I couldn’t stand to slow down for a full minute), which allowed me enough of a break to maintain my pace. Going slowly through the water station put me at risk of being hit with a tossed cup of water or Gatorade by a fellow runner, and which actually did happen at one point. Luckily the light rain kept me from getting too sticky from the Gatorade.
As more rain fell, the drops mixed with my salty sweat and stung my eyes. I missed the sponge station, so had no sponge to wash the salt away.
Nearing the 14 kilometer marker. A discomfort in my right ankle begins to niggle at me. The crowds thicken along the canal. Someone I know shouts my name and I look back and wave. Bands play music, lift my spirits and help to put a spring back in my tired stride. One more hill and then the homeward stretch. Exhaustion pulls at my muscles, but I still maintain my pace. The rain continues to fall and I feel a chill.
I finally reach the 20km marker – only 1 km to go! I try to pick up my pace, and manage to do so for about 400m before realizing that I might not have enough zip to carry me all the way. Suddenly I spot the sign telling me I’m 400m from the finish. I barely pick up my pace; I feel like I’m going to vomit for all the gel in my system. 300m….200m – I’m dying, c’mon where’s the finish!!...100m….As I cross the finish line, I pump my fist in the air and come to a gasping, stumbling stop.
As soon as I stop, my legs feel like they might collapse; there is nothing left! I am wrapped in a silver thermal ‘blanket’, and pick up my medal. I slip it over my neck and relish the moment as much as I can in my foggy, exhausted state of mind. I grab a bagel, banana, yogurt and water, and find a quiet spot to stretch. I ran into another RR buddy and we exchanged our finishing times and congratulations.
I left the clogged recovery area to find Mark, and we headed home. I could barely stand to walk or stand up because of the ache in my legs! Three hours after the race, I did a cold-hot session in the bath tub, and it felt great and helped to ease the stiffness I will feel on Monday. I celebrated my race with one of the best meals I’ve had at our favorite Indian restaurant. Maybe it was the taste of sweet success!
Now today, Monday, I’m on a bit of a high; my enthusiasm and excitement from yesterday’s race are spilling over into today. I hope I don’t crash later in the week – whether from exhaustion or from depression. The race seemingly passed in a blur and I can’t believe I did it. It’s over!
What’s next? I’m already looking forward to doing another half marathon sometime. Maybe in the fall.
Monday, May 28, 2007
Thursday, May 24, 2007
Only 3 sleeps left!
Today is the first really humid, hot day in Ottawa. It coincided with a Sens rally at City Hall at noon hour today. I popped by but couldn't hack the heat and stiffling crowd, so quickly left again. Go Sens! It's pretty exciting that they're in the Stanley Cup playoff!!
I had my sport massage last night and it was blissful. My muscles felt a lot better today, and I even got out for a short, relaxing run after work just to stay loose and limber. I went around Mud Lake and saw a little turtle crossing the path in front of me.
Last Monday, I felt the anxiety of the race creep up on me. I previously wrote (below) that I had a restless sleep on Monday night because I was fretting so much. However, at this moment, I can report that I am much more calm thanks to my Running Room running buddy. On Tuesday night, we both ran with the RR group (10km at race pace, ugh). After the run, I got a ride home with my clinic buddy and we talked about how we felt on that run. We have both been feeling tired and worn out of late, and have both been ravenously, inexplicably craving chocolate. Anyway, I voiced my concern about how tired I felt going up a particular hill that night, and she said to me that she's not even going to worry about that because this is her first half marathon, like me, and so she's focusing on just finishing the race and whatever time she gets will serve as a benchmark for future races. I found what she said extremely reassuring.
She's quite right - whatever time I get on Sunday will be a Personal Best for me. I shouldn't put so much pressure on myself to finish faster than my original goal time. I really want to enjoy this race and have fun, and not feel like I am killing myself just to prove to myself that I can beat my goal time.
So, now I'm focusing on feeling more relaxed and calm and am working on not putting so much pressure and expectation on myself. A few aches and pains in my legs have been making themselves known during the last two weeks, so I had better prepare myself regardless in case something goes wrong during the race and I have to back off my pace entirely. Let the mental preparation and visualization begin!!
Okay, gotta go; 30 Rock is on tv!!
I had my sport massage last night and it was blissful. My muscles felt a lot better today, and I even got out for a short, relaxing run after work just to stay loose and limber. I went around Mud Lake and saw a little turtle crossing the path in front of me.
Last Monday, I felt the anxiety of the race creep up on me. I previously wrote (below) that I had a restless sleep on Monday night because I was fretting so much. However, at this moment, I can report that I am much more calm thanks to my Running Room running buddy. On Tuesday night, we both ran with the RR group (10km at race pace, ugh). After the run, I got a ride home with my clinic buddy and we talked about how we felt on that run. We have both been feeling tired and worn out of late, and have both been ravenously, inexplicably craving chocolate. Anyway, I voiced my concern about how tired I felt going up a particular hill that night, and she said to me that she's not even going to worry about that because this is her first half marathon, like me, and so she's focusing on just finishing the race and whatever time she gets will serve as a benchmark for future races. I found what she said extremely reassuring.
She's quite right - whatever time I get on Sunday will be a Personal Best for me. I shouldn't put so much pressure on myself to finish faster than my original goal time. I really want to enjoy this race and have fun, and not feel like I am killing myself just to prove to myself that I can beat my goal time.
So, now I'm focusing on feeling more relaxed and calm and am working on not putting so much pressure and expectation on myself. A few aches and pains in my legs have been making themselves known during the last two weeks, so I had better prepare myself regardless in case something goes wrong during the race and I have to back off my pace entirely. Let the mental preparation and visualization begin!!
Okay, gotta go; 30 Rock is on tv!!
Tick Tock - the countdown is on
My race is in five short days and I am already losing sleep over it. Last night, I was anxious and nervous, not to mention completely revved up from a dragon boat practice, so was tossing for quite awhile before falling asleep. I need to relax; I need to sleep!
My diet for the week is already planned; my race outfit is identified; my gels are purchased; my sport massage is booked for Wednesday night…I’m nearly set. Just need to work on my mental prep and a few physical ones. Gotta shake that tired feeling, which has me worried.
Tonight, I’m doing a 10km run at race pace with a Running Room group. I need the group tonight because I am tired, I feel worn out, and the group will help pull me along. Well, at least that’s what I’m counting on. And I’m skipping boxing tonight so I can do this run – unprecedented!
On a completely different subject, Ottawa is finally coming alive. The blossoms and lilacs are out, filling the air with some of my favorite smells. With the sun shining, my spirits are lifted. On Saturday, M & I walked around Mud Lake and it was just alive with life - ducks, geese, beaver, turtles, chipmunks, woodpeckers, and tons of other chirpy, happy birds. It was marvelous. Mud Lake, to put it simply, rocks!
And on another note – we starting looking at houses a titch more seriously this weekend. We set out on our bikes on Monday afternoon to scope out some neighbourhoods and look for For Sale signs. With almost comedic timing, Mark’s bike got a flat about 15 minutes into our adventure and crushed our rosy-eyed plans. So we trudged back home, but not before eating our picnic lunch near the river. At least lunch was satisfying!
My diet for the week is already planned; my race outfit is identified; my gels are purchased; my sport massage is booked for Wednesday night…I’m nearly set. Just need to work on my mental prep and a few physical ones. Gotta shake that tired feeling, which has me worried.
Tonight, I’m doing a 10km run at race pace with a Running Room group. I need the group tonight because I am tired, I feel worn out, and the group will help pull me along. Well, at least that’s what I’m counting on. And I’m skipping boxing tonight so I can do this run – unprecedented!
On a completely different subject, Ottawa is finally coming alive. The blossoms and lilacs are out, filling the air with some of my favorite smells. With the sun shining, my spirits are lifted. On Saturday, M & I walked around Mud Lake and it was just alive with life - ducks, geese, beaver, turtles, chipmunks, woodpeckers, and tons of other chirpy, happy birds. It was marvelous. Mud Lake, to put it simply, rocks!
And on another note – we starting looking at houses a titch more seriously this weekend. We set out on our bikes on Monday afternoon to scope out some neighbourhoods and look for For Sale signs. With almost comedic timing, Mark’s bike got a flat about 15 minutes into our adventure and crushed our rosy-eyed plans. So we trudged back home, but not before eating our picnic lunch near the river. At least lunch was satisfying!
Monday, May 14, 2007
Mission Accomplished!!
I did it! I did my 20km run tonight! Mark came with me and rode beside me on the bike, which was very motivating for me. I ran from our apartment and headed east for 10km, which brought me to the front steps of Parliament Hill. I then turned around and headed for home with a strong head wind in my face. My path was alongside the Ottawa River for most of the way and was very pleasant and relaxing. In fact, I can hardly believe how quickly the time and the distance passed. I did it in 1:48, which is only 3 minutes off my goal time for the race - and I wasn't even running at race pace! Hah, I think I'm in good shape! Cross my fingers my quad stays healthy.
On tonight's run, my legs were heavy, and my quadricep was in enough of a state to slow me down and make me groan going up the hills. As soon as we got home and after a good stretch, I hopped in the tub for a cold-hot session. I sat in freezing cold water for three minutes, and then sat in hot water for 3 minutes. That felt soooo good and sooo therapeutic. I wanted to do at least one more round, but Mark called me for dinner (left over butter chicken, rice, samosas and pakoras, yum yum).
My toes and balls of my feet hurt like crazy, my muscles are tired and my back still aches from the weekend; however, I feel GREAT and HAPPY and PUMPED UP!!! Ahhh, there's nothing like a good run with good company to refresh the spirit!
Peace out -
On tonight's run, my legs were heavy, and my quadricep was in enough of a state to slow me down and make me groan going up the hills. As soon as we got home and after a good stretch, I hopped in the tub for a cold-hot session. I sat in freezing cold water for three minutes, and then sat in hot water for 3 minutes. That felt soooo good and sooo therapeutic. I wanted to do at least one more round, but Mark called me for dinner (left over butter chicken, rice, samosas and pakoras, yum yum).
My toes and balls of my feet hurt like crazy, my muscles are tired and my back still aches from the weekend; however, I feel GREAT and HAPPY and PUMPED UP!!! Ahhh, there's nothing like a good run with good company to refresh the spirit!
Peace out -
Wicked Welts and Aching Muscles Equal a Good Time
This morning, I woke up exhausted and aching despite having crawled to bed early on Sunday night. My body feels shriveled like a grape or a dried date; actually, it’s more like my muscles feel that way - tight, very, very tight.
I spent the weekend with my team in Lachine at a dragon boat training camp, which was a ton of fun. My confidence in my skill has increased ten-fold based on the feedback from our instructor. Every muscle in my body aches and my butt is raw from the hard seats; my scalp and my lips are burnt from the sun. But I had so much fun!! It was great getting to know some of our teammates, too, despite those same teammates sabotaging my good intentions to return to Ottawa on Saturday night!
For my marathon training, this weekend was to have been our last long run before the race, which is only two weeks away now. I intended to do the 20km run with my group on Sunday morning, having returned from Montreal on Saturday night. However, on Saturday evening I was sabotaged with one too many beers and so could not drive home safely. Instead, I remained in Montreal and participated in the second day of training camp, and missed my run with a promise from Mark that he will ride alongside me on Monday night so that I wouldn’t have to do my run alone.
Despite my immense guilt and self-berating for missing the run, I really enjoyed doing the second day of the camp and was also able to pick up my brand new paddle, which I’d purchased the day before. I’m so excited to have my own paddle now!
Last night when we got back, I roused myself from my cloud of pain and did a gentle, extremely relaxing 6 km run. It must not have been gentle enough, though, because I think I’ve strained my right quadricep. I know I should take today off; however, I’m a stubborn cow and I’m doing my 20km run tonight!! Nothing is stopping me except maybe a thunderstorm!
I spent the weekend with my team in Lachine at a dragon boat training camp, which was a ton of fun. My confidence in my skill has increased ten-fold based on the feedback from our instructor. Every muscle in my body aches and my butt is raw from the hard seats; my scalp and my lips are burnt from the sun. But I had so much fun!! It was great getting to know some of our teammates, too, despite those same teammates sabotaging my good intentions to return to Ottawa on Saturday night!
For my marathon training, this weekend was to have been our last long run before the race, which is only two weeks away now. I intended to do the 20km run with my group on Sunday morning, having returned from Montreal on Saturday night. However, on Saturday evening I was sabotaged with one too many beers and so could not drive home safely. Instead, I remained in Montreal and participated in the second day of training camp, and missed my run with a promise from Mark that he will ride alongside me on Monday night so that I wouldn’t have to do my run alone.
Despite my immense guilt and self-berating for missing the run, I really enjoyed doing the second day of the camp and was also able to pick up my brand new paddle, which I’d purchased the day before. I’m so excited to have my own paddle now!
Last night when we got back, I roused myself from my cloud of pain and did a gentle, extremely relaxing 6 km run. It must not have been gentle enough, though, because I think I’ve strained my right quadricep. I know I should take today off; however, I’m a stubborn cow and I’m doing my 20km run tonight!! Nothing is stopping me except maybe a thunderstorm!
Sunday, May 6, 2007
Long live a man who loves to cook!
We, or rather Mark, discovered this morning that we get cooking shows on demand with Rogers On Demand. I am quite thrilled to be reaping this benefit tonight.
Mark likes to cook, and he is an excellent cook. Upon discovering this On Demand feature, he watched a cooking show this morning, while I showered after my 18km training run. When we were grocery shopping later this afternoon, he informed me that tonight we were having feta stuffed lamb meatballs with a homemade sun dried tomato pasta sauce over spaghetti squash with cauliflower garlic bread. At first I thought maybe he was joking because it sounded so decadent and complicated, but to my delight he was quite serious.
He has been cooking for the past hour or so, while I've been cleaning out my closing and putting away my winter sweaters. The smells emanating from the kitchen are divine and I can't wait to try these feta stuffed creations.
With the warm evening sun poring through our windows, I've uncorked a bottle of wine and am delightfully sipping away as I type this, and am anticipating a delicious meal.
Long live a man who can cook, and one who genuinely loves to cook!
And long live the women who love the men who love to cook, haha!
Mark likes to cook, and he is an excellent cook. Upon discovering this On Demand feature, he watched a cooking show this morning, while I showered after my 18km training run. When we were grocery shopping later this afternoon, he informed me that tonight we were having feta stuffed lamb meatballs with a homemade sun dried tomato pasta sauce over spaghetti squash with cauliflower garlic bread. At first I thought maybe he was joking because it sounded so decadent and complicated, but to my delight he was quite serious.
He has been cooking for the past hour or so, while I've been cleaning out my closing and putting away my winter sweaters. The smells emanating from the kitchen are divine and I can't wait to try these feta stuffed creations.
With the warm evening sun poring through our windows, I've uncorked a bottle of wine and am delightfully sipping away as I type this, and am anticipating a delicious meal.
Long live a man who can cook, and one who genuinely loves to cook!
And long live the women who love the men who love to cook, haha!
Saturday, March 31, 2007
Long may you run
I realized today that I have been a runner for half of my life. Running defines my life, it defines me; it is a habit; it is an addiction; it is necessity. I became a runner almost by accident: in 8th grade gym class, we endured the requisite cross country running unit and I was usually the first female in the class to cross the finish line at the end of each run. I didn't pay too much attention to this; I'm sure I was probably more concerned with boys and gossip and other such teenage things. But at parent-teacher interviews, my gym teacher mentioned to my mom that I was a good runner and should consider joining a track club. I remember not long after that, I joined the Kamloops Track and Field Club. I think this had more to do with my parents pushing me to join than with me joining of my own accord.
In my first year with KTFC, I raced the sprints like the 100m and 200m, and tried javelin and long jump. In the following years, I focused on the 800m and 1500m. I loved the training, and learning about nutrition, training and fitness. But oh, how I hated the butterflies that savaged my stomach hours before the start of any race. Looking back now, I don't think I knew how to channel that nervous energy - fourteen years later, I could now provide some advice my younger self.
I continued training at UBC for one or two years with one of my KTFC friends, but I also started to do long runs for my own pleasure or as stress-relief, with less focus on training for competition. And now running is simply my lifestyle. It is like flossing my teeth - I love it and hate it ('cause let's face it, there's some days when I really don't want to run, just like sometimes I really hate flossing but it feels so good after you've done it.)
I have gone through quite possibly hundreds of pairs of running shoes; I still have my old track spikes buried in a box somewhere in my parents house in Kamloops. I still have my KTFC and UBC track suits. I have a ratty, yellowed collection of shirts from various track meets and, more recently, 10km races. These are my keepsakes, my mile-markers.
And I can't wait to add my first half marathon shirt and medal to the collection. I'm out to prove to myself that I can do it, to challenge myself and test my limits. I worry about my knees and other joints because as I get older, the ol' knees are becoming more sensitive!
It was while I was ruefully examining my worse-for-wear feet, vaguely thinking that sandal season is a cruel time, that I realized I've been running for half my life. I looked at my hardened, calloused toes and saw evidence of fourteen years worth of pounding the pavement. I only hope that they will carry me through another fourteen years of healthy running and racing. And I hope that I feel strong, healthy and prepared come race day!
In my first year with KTFC, I raced the sprints like the 100m and 200m, and tried javelin and long jump. In the following years, I focused on the 800m and 1500m. I loved the training, and learning about nutrition, training and fitness. But oh, how I hated the butterflies that savaged my stomach hours before the start of any race. Looking back now, I don't think I knew how to channel that nervous energy - fourteen years later, I could now provide some advice my younger self.
I continued training at UBC for one or two years with one of my KTFC friends, but I also started to do long runs for my own pleasure or as stress-relief, with less focus on training for competition. And now running is simply my lifestyle. It is like flossing my teeth - I love it and hate it ('cause let's face it, there's some days when I really don't want to run, just like sometimes I really hate flossing but it feels so good after you've done it.)
I have gone through quite possibly hundreds of pairs of running shoes; I still have my old track spikes buried in a box somewhere in my parents house in Kamloops. I still have my KTFC and UBC track suits. I have a ratty, yellowed collection of shirts from various track meets and, more recently, 10km races. These are my keepsakes, my mile-markers.
And I can't wait to add my first half marathon shirt and medal to the collection. I'm out to prove to myself that I can do it, to challenge myself and test my limits. I worry about my knees and other joints because as I get older, the ol' knees are becoming more sensitive!
It was while I was ruefully examining my worse-for-wear feet, vaguely thinking that sandal season is a cruel time, that I realized I've been running for half my life. I looked at my hardened, calloused toes and saw evidence of fourteen years worth of pounding the pavement. I only hope that they will carry me through another fourteen years of healthy running and racing. And I hope that I feel strong, healthy and prepared come race day!
Thursday, March 22, 2007
The healing power of running
At 5pm tonight, I laced up my running shoes, zipped up my jacket, waited for the satellites to locate on my handy GPS watch, and squeezed in a mind-clearing 5km training run.
Today was a mild day - low teens - with a bit of wind and a bit of rain. The air was filled with the anticipation of spring, and the light mist that started falling soothed my soul. It reminded me a bit of the misty rainy days in Vancouver.
I maintained a steady speed, as per RR's instructions, but I didn't maintain the proper speed. According to my training sheet, I should have been running 5:14 min/km and instead I found myself running about 4:40 min/km. I'm having a hard time keeping my pace down for most of my runs! It just feels so slow to me and I irrationally berate myself for going slower. I can never just go easy on myself.
I ended my run by doing a lap around Parliament Hill. And I thought to myself, "how neat is it that I can just run right in front of Canada's parliament buildings!" It is a priviledge to be able to do so. It is a priviledge to be so free.
Despite the sore, stiff, tired feeling in my legs, my heart lifted. A beautiful, mild day and a fresh smell in the air combined with some pick-me-up tunes on my iPod and a consistent spring to my step was all I needed to feel level again.
Now I just need a really good night's sleep!
Today was a mild day - low teens - with a bit of wind and a bit of rain. The air was filled with the anticipation of spring, and the light mist that started falling soothed my soul. It reminded me a bit of the misty rainy days in Vancouver.
I maintained a steady speed, as per RR's instructions, but I didn't maintain the proper speed. According to my training sheet, I should have been running 5:14 min/km and instead I found myself running about 4:40 min/km. I'm having a hard time keeping my pace down for most of my runs! It just feels so slow to me and I irrationally berate myself for going slower. I can never just go easy on myself.
I ended my run by doing a lap around Parliament Hill. And I thought to myself, "how neat is it that I can just run right in front of Canada's parliament buildings!" It is a priviledge to be able to do so. It is a priviledge to be so free.
Despite the sore, stiff, tired feeling in my legs, my heart lifted. A beautiful, mild day and a fresh smell in the air combined with some pick-me-up tunes on my iPod and a consistent spring to my step was all I needed to feel level again.
Now I just need a really good night's sleep!
Another chapter closes
After spending most of yesterday in a rather gloomy fog, I found out from my oldest friend last night that she has indeed been transferred back to Vancouver. They leave in 90 days.
I am genuinely excited for her, but I am also very sad for me.
I am genuinely excited for her, but I am also very sad for me.
Trippin' down memory lane
I opened my email inbox yesterday to find my bi-monthly UBC alumni newsletter. This month’s issue was interesting and I went through the whole thing, feeling those pangs of attachment to my old alma mater. One item in particular piqued my interest, which was the blog of a current UBC student hosted on the Alumni website. I could visualize his references to various points on campus and in Kits; I once knew it so well – my old stomping grounds. His stories brought back waves of nostalgia and, uncomfortably, a deep sadness for a life that is no more, a chapter closed.
I miss Pacific Spirit Park, where the old cedars tower above you and their fresh scent fills your lungs; I miss the sound of my feet striking the earth as I jog on the Lily of the Valley Trail or the Admiral Trail that leads you down to Spanish Banks. I miss Blue Chip Cookies; I miss Main Library; I miss that huge tree that sits outside the biology building that just envelops you in its giant branches.
I miss living in our apartment on Broadway, which coincidentally was just steps from the best dessert restaurant I’ve ever known. I miss the smell of salty sea air; I even miss the rainy days! I miss the beautiful mountains that rise magnificently over English Bay and seeing all the tankers and cruise ships in the harbour. I miss the cherry blossoms and daffodils that sprout in March. I miss rollerblading around the sea wall at Stanley Park. I miss being closer to my family. I miss BC and its beauty.
In reminiscing about my life in Vancouver, I can’t help but feel the same question that bubbles up in me every time I go down this memory lane, “what am I doing here [in Ottawa]? How did I get here?” Sometimes, I feel so far from my roots that I feel lost. But isn’t that the heartbreaker: nothing stays the same.
Vancouver is a stranger now. The city has changed and grown so much. When I go back to visit, I do not feel a part of it; no one looks familiar; stores and businesses have come and gone. It is the natural evolution of a city and it is silly to expect that anything would stay around and wait for me to come back. Or that I would stay the same – I am not the same person I was when I left BC and intuitively I know that if I did go back, I wouldn’t necessarily feel the same way about Vancouver as I do in my sentimental memories.
Once this short-lived sadness passes, I feel comfortable with my current path. I have a pleasant, uncomplicated life in Ottawa. I have found many things here that make me happy. I have friends (albeit a very small circle); I live close to some amazing parks for camping & hiking; I have gotten to know some of my extended family who live near Toronto; I have a partner who values many of the same things I do in life. Ottawa is a great city that fits my needs despite its climate of frigid winters and humid summers.
One of my oldest friends moved to Ottawa from BC a few years ago for a job opportunity. Her intention was the same as mine - to stay for only two years. She’s been here three years now, and she and her husband are now actively pursuing opportunities to move back, and they are talking about moving back with increasing certainty. I dread the day she calls me and tells me they are leaving. My heart will break a little bit. I will be a little bit lonelier when she leaves. She knows where I come from; she knows my history and I know hers.
Funnily enough, it was she who made me realize that I am settled here; my roots are more solidly planted than I had realized. Throughout her time here, our conversations had frequently, inevitably, turned to how much we missed our families and the mountains and the perfect BC weather, and we talked about moving back. It was not long ago when we were having one of our chats that I was struck by the realization that my sense of temporary displacement was diminishing; my focus on moving back was lessening and my comfort level of living in Ottawa was neutralizing. I realized that I had slowly, unconsciously, come to appreciate the city and feel that it was home.
Except that family, mine and also Mark’s are still far away. I do still feel homesick, especially right now.
I miss Pacific Spirit Park, where the old cedars tower above you and their fresh scent fills your lungs; I miss the sound of my feet striking the earth as I jog on the Lily of the Valley Trail or the Admiral Trail that leads you down to Spanish Banks. I miss Blue Chip Cookies; I miss Main Library; I miss that huge tree that sits outside the biology building that just envelops you in its giant branches.
I miss living in our apartment on Broadway, which coincidentally was just steps from the best dessert restaurant I’ve ever known. I miss the smell of salty sea air; I even miss the rainy days! I miss the beautiful mountains that rise magnificently over English Bay and seeing all the tankers and cruise ships in the harbour. I miss the cherry blossoms and daffodils that sprout in March. I miss rollerblading around the sea wall at Stanley Park. I miss being closer to my family. I miss BC and its beauty.
In reminiscing about my life in Vancouver, I can’t help but feel the same question that bubbles up in me every time I go down this memory lane, “what am I doing here [in Ottawa]? How did I get here?” Sometimes, I feel so far from my roots that I feel lost. But isn’t that the heartbreaker: nothing stays the same.
Vancouver is a stranger now. The city has changed and grown so much. When I go back to visit, I do not feel a part of it; no one looks familiar; stores and businesses have come and gone. It is the natural evolution of a city and it is silly to expect that anything would stay around and wait for me to come back. Or that I would stay the same – I am not the same person I was when I left BC and intuitively I know that if I did go back, I wouldn’t necessarily feel the same way about Vancouver as I do in my sentimental memories.
Once this short-lived sadness passes, I feel comfortable with my current path. I have a pleasant, uncomplicated life in Ottawa. I have found many things here that make me happy. I have friends (albeit a very small circle); I live close to some amazing parks for camping & hiking; I have gotten to know some of my extended family who live near Toronto; I have a partner who values many of the same things I do in life. Ottawa is a great city that fits my needs despite its climate of frigid winters and humid summers.
One of my oldest friends moved to Ottawa from BC a few years ago for a job opportunity. Her intention was the same as mine - to stay for only two years. She’s been here three years now, and she and her husband are now actively pursuing opportunities to move back, and they are talking about moving back with increasing certainty. I dread the day she calls me and tells me they are leaving. My heart will break a little bit. I will be a little bit lonelier when she leaves. She knows where I come from; she knows my history and I know hers.
Funnily enough, it was she who made me realize that I am settled here; my roots are more solidly planted than I had realized. Throughout her time here, our conversations had frequently, inevitably, turned to how much we missed our families and the mountains and the perfect BC weather, and we talked about moving back. It was not long ago when we were having one of our chats that I was struck by the realization that my sense of temporary displacement was diminishing; my focus on moving back was lessening and my comfort level of living in Ottawa was neutralizing. I realized that I had slowly, unconsciously, come to appreciate the city and feel that it was home.
Except that family, mine and also Mark’s are still far away. I do still feel homesick, especially right now.
Saturday, March 17, 2007
Sidesplitters
Okay, I just gotta share my favorite lines from two favorite tv shows.
1) From 30 Rock: Tina Fey's character, Liz Lemmon, is told by her boss, Alec Baldwin, that she has to fire 10% of her staff. In digesting this stressful prospect, she replies, "Excuse me, I have to go have a conversation with some food." If you are woman, and a woman who eats emotionally, this is hilarious.
2) From Seinfeld: Jerry and Kramer are discussing something, I forget what exactly, but Jerry says, "Are you crazy?!" and Kramer replies, "Am I? Am I, Jerry? Or am I so sane that you just BLEW your mind?!" If anyone remembers which episode this is from, please remind me!
1) From 30 Rock: Tina Fey's character, Liz Lemmon, is told by her boss, Alec Baldwin, that she has to fire 10% of her staff. In digesting this stressful prospect, she replies, "Excuse me, I have to go have a conversation with some food." If you are woman, and a woman who eats emotionally, this is hilarious.
2) From Seinfeld: Jerry and Kramer are discussing something, I forget what exactly, but Jerry says, "Are you crazy?!" and Kramer replies, "Am I? Am I, Jerry? Or am I so sane that you just BLEW your mind?!" If anyone remembers which episode this is from, please remind me!
Cold, Cuts
I cut the tip of my middle finger last night on the blade of our mini-chopper. It really hurts as I'm sitting here typing and putting pressure on the cut whenever I hit the "i", "k" or "m" keys. I also cut the tip of my index finger on the lid of a yogurt container on Thursday. No cuts in years, and then two on consecutives fingers within 24 hours. The inability to really use my two fingers for typically mundane, routine tasks makes me aware of how much I appreciate my fully intact body - I mean, some people have had fingers removed, and I'm lucky enough just to have a cut that will heal itself in a few days time. ...and I bet you're asking how the heck does one cut their finger on a yogurt lid??
This morning, we rose at 7:15am for our 5km St Paddy's Day race. There was about an inch or two of snow on the ground - yuck! Overall, we both enjoyed ourselves, but I'm slightly disappointed with my race. My muscles felt heavy and tired even before we started, which is a Very Bad Thing. The snow seeped into my shoes, soaking my feet and my thighs froze in the headwind making my legs feel heavier. The first km was tough mentally, my body just did not want to run! It wanted to crawl back to bed! But then I got into my rhythm which got me through to about 4km when I started to die again. I was disappointed that I slowed up a few times to a jog, although it was necessary. And I didn't like that I didn't have very much power at the end of the race to pick up the pace in the last 500m to beat the clock. I crossed at 23 minutes flat, which I'm happy with, but I'm disappointed that I wasn't feeling stronger to see if I could have got an even lower time. I was fourth female to cross the finish line and second in my age category! Mark crossed at 30 minutes and was the eighth male to cross the line in his age category. If I had been running the 1/2 marathon today and feeling as poopy as I did, it would have been a hellish experience.
This afternoon we went to a pre-season training session with our new dragon boat team. The familiar paddling motion and aches in my muscles were reassuring and, well, familiar. Comfortable. I'm sure my back and shoulders will be in acute pain tomorrow, if not tonight. And, my God, my butt was in agony sitting on the hard tiled pool deck. Bex, if you're reading this, be warned - it's worse than the hard seat of the boat itself. Oh mama. The outline of the season ahead looks quite intense compared to our former team.
Mark is now engrossed in his March Madness basketball games and I'm sitting here trying to make the best of it. I have my RR clinic tomorrow a.m., so I'll be back outside in this stupid winter weather again, bright and early. We're doing 10km again this week.
I guess I'll go now and relax with my hot cup of comforting tea!
This morning, we rose at 7:15am for our 5km St Paddy's Day race. There was about an inch or two of snow on the ground - yuck! Overall, we both enjoyed ourselves, but I'm slightly disappointed with my race. My muscles felt heavy and tired even before we started, which is a Very Bad Thing. The snow seeped into my shoes, soaking my feet and my thighs froze in the headwind making my legs feel heavier. The first km was tough mentally, my body just did not want to run! It wanted to crawl back to bed! But then I got into my rhythm which got me through to about 4km when I started to die again. I was disappointed that I slowed up a few times to a jog, although it was necessary. And I didn't like that I didn't have very much power at the end of the race to pick up the pace in the last 500m to beat the clock. I crossed at 23 minutes flat, which I'm happy with, but I'm disappointed that I wasn't feeling stronger to see if I could have got an even lower time. I was fourth female to cross the finish line and second in my age category! Mark crossed at 30 minutes and was the eighth male to cross the line in his age category. If I had been running the 1/2 marathon today and feeling as poopy as I did, it would have been a hellish experience.
This afternoon we went to a pre-season training session with our new dragon boat team. The familiar paddling motion and aches in my muscles were reassuring and, well, familiar. Comfortable. I'm sure my back and shoulders will be in acute pain tomorrow, if not tonight. And, my God, my butt was in agony sitting on the hard tiled pool deck. Bex, if you're reading this, be warned - it's worse than the hard seat of the boat itself. Oh mama. The outline of the season ahead looks quite intense compared to our former team.
Mark is now engrossed in his March Madness basketball games and I'm sitting here trying to make the best of it. I have my RR clinic tomorrow a.m., so I'll be back outside in this stupid winter weather again, bright and early. We're doing 10km again this week.
I guess I'll go now and relax with my hot cup of comforting tea!
Thursday, March 15, 2007
My body wasn't built for this
Today is a busy day at work and I have been glued to my desk for 98% of the day. I am going squirrelly; my back hurts; my muscles ache; my eyes are fuzzy; my brain is tired. And my shoulders are up to my ears. I am stiff like a corpse. I haven’t seen the light of day since 8am this morning. It’s days like this that I dislike my work; or at least dislike not having clients that I can visit on other floors thereby enabling me to step away from my desk and stretch my legs.
Okay, enough venting – sorry, just had to get it out!
Now, my body WAS made for this: on Saturday, Mark and I are racing in the local St. Patty’s Day Run. We’re doing the 5km, and I’m excited because I haven’t raced a 5km before, only 10km races. And I’m counting the race toward my weekly training schedule (especially since I’m missing today’s run, boohoo!). Coincidentally, the mercury is plummeting tonight and is expected to remain low until after the weekend ie: back into the negative temps with snow flurries. If only Mother Nature could make up her mind to let go of winter…especially after the teasingly mild temps of this week. But I will not let the poopy weekend weather dampen my racing spirits!
Also on Saturday, Mark and I are joining our new dragon boat team for a pre-season training session. That’s right, our old team has folded this year, and we have been lucky enough to join up with our former foes. I’m looking forward to getting back into the paddling action with a new team – and some of my favorite teammates from the old team are also joining, so that’s double excitement, haha!
Okay, enough venting – sorry, just had to get it out!
Now, my body WAS made for this: on Saturday, Mark and I are racing in the local St. Patty’s Day Run. We’re doing the 5km, and I’m excited because I haven’t raced a 5km before, only 10km races. And I’m counting the race toward my weekly training schedule (especially since I’m missing today’s run, boohoo!). Coincidentally, the mercury is plummeting tonight and is expected to remain low until after the weekend ie: back into the negative temps with snow flurries. If only Mother Nature could make up her mind to let go of winter…especially after the teasingly mild temps of this week. But I will not let the poopy weekend weather dampen my racing spirits!
Also on Saturday, Mark and I are joining our new dragon boat team for a pre-season training session. That’s right, our old team has folded this year, and we have been lucky enough to join up with our former foes. I’m looking forward to getting back into the paddling action with a new team – and some of my favorite teammates from the old team are also joining, so that’s double excitement, haha!
Saturday, March 10, 2007
Where did the last ten years go?
As I was blow drying my hair this morning, I suddenly realized that in a few weeks time, I'm turning 29. A shock went through me. Twenty-nine. One year closer to thirty. I am not ready to leave my 20s behind me. Oyyyy!
In the car yesterday, we were listening to a classic rock radio station on our way somewhere. The station played "Losing my Religion" by REM, which was a song released when I was in seventh grade, followed by a few other songs that were released when I was in high school. Mark made the observation that the songs we were listening to in high school are now playing on classic rock stations and considered "classic". When did we become old enough that the songs of my youth are now considered "classic"??
In the car yesterday, we were listening to a classic rock radio station on our way somewhere. The station played "Losing my Religion" by REM, which was a song released when I was in seventh grade, followed by a few other songs that were released when I was in high school. Mark made the observation that the songs we were listening to in high school are now playing on classic rock stations and considered "classic". When did we become old enough that the songs of my youth are now considered "classic"??
Friday, March 9, 2007
Retraining my brain and my legs: a lesson in patience
This week marks my first real week of training – last week was a bit of a dud due to the cold and that I didn’t have the training manual yet. I’ve completed three runs this week: two tempo runs of 2 and 3 miles respectively (3km and 5km), and one 2.5 mile steady run, as directed by my Running Room (RR) training manual. These runs were completed at a particular speed and heart rate maximum, again according to RR book. And I have to say I kinda struggled mentally.
Prior to commencing this training, my runs consisted of a minimum of 8km and upwards of 10, 12, 15km. So these 2 and 3 mile runs were insanely short to me. At the end of these runs, it felt very strange to step off the treadmill and not feel spent or pushed to my limits or soaked in sweat. I had to consciously reign myself in to stick within a particular speed despite the desire to go faster or farther.
In some ways, I almost feel relieved that I’m not pushing myself as hard as I did before, and in other ways, I’m really freaking out because I worry that I might be losing endurance or lung capacity or that I might become too used to doing such short runs that I become a lazy runner (by my definition), and not to mention that I actually like pushing myself and being “in the zone” and feeding off the adrenaline high! And our long runs on Sundays are at a much slower pace, which I struggled with last week because my legs wanted to burst ahead and my lungs wanted to feel the burn.
Perhaps another way of looking at this new method is that I’m running shorter distances more often during the week; whereas before I was running longer distances less often per week. So perhaps I’m actually covering the same, if not more, mileage as I was before, and it’s just spread out a bit differently.
The RR philosophy described in the book is sensible – take it slow, avoid injury. I will embrace that philosophy, believe in it and trust it. I will work on readjusting my training patterns because now I’m training with a particular goal in mind – before I was just running for the sheer “pleasure” of it and running for however long I felt like it that particular day.
In re-reading these paragraphs, I worry I come off sounding – I can’t place the correct word at the moment – like a jerk or something. Running is not easy, and I don’t want to down play the efforts that go into running any distance, short or long. I think it’s more my own attitude; I mean, as a Taurus, I’m impatient and want to achieve a particular goal/result/etc now! I just have to slow down the pace, adjust my perspective, and look forward to that adrenaline high on May 27th when I cross the finish line!
Said the tortoise to the hare, “slow and steady wins the race.”
Prior to commencing this training, my runs consisted of a minimum of 8km and upwards of 10, 12, 15km. So these 2 and 3 mile runs were insanely short to me. At the end of these runs, it felt very strange to step off the treadmill and not feel spent or pushed to my limits or soaked in sweat. I had to consciously reign myself in to stick within a particular speed despite the desire to go faster or farther.
In some ways, I almost feel relieved that I’m not pushing myself as hard as I did before, and in other ways, I’m really freaking out because I worry that I might be losing endurance or lung capacity or that I might become too used to doing such short runs that I become a lazy runner (by my definition), and not to mention that I actually like pushing myself and being “in the zone” and feeding off the adrenaline high! And our long runs on Sundays are at a much slower pace, which I struggled with last week because my legs wanted to burst ahead and my lungs wanted to feel the burn.
Perhaps another way of looking at this new method is that I’m running shorter distances more often during the week; whereas before I was running longer distances less often per week. So perhaps I’m actually covering the same, if not more, mileage as I was before, and it’s just spread out a bit differently.
The RR philosophy described in the book is sensible – take it slow, avoid injury. I will embrace that philosophy, believe in it and trust it. I will work on readjusting my training patterns because now I’m training with a particular goal in mind – before I was just running for the sheer “pleasure” of it and running for however long I felt like it that particular day.
In re-reading these paragraphs, I worry I come off sounding – I can’t place the correct word at the moment – like a jerk or something. Running is not easy, and I don’t want to down play the efforts that go into running any distance, short or long. I think it’s more my own attitude; I mean, as a Taurus, I’m impatient and want to achieve a particular goal/result/etc now! I just have to slow down the pace, adjust my perspective, and look forward to that adrenaline high on May 27th when I cross the finish line!
Said the tortoise to the hare, “slow and steady wins the race.”
Sunday, March 4, 2007
The first running clinic!
This morning, I arose from bed at 7:15am, which is too early for a Sunday morning, and shuffled to the kitchen for a half a banana and a zuchini muffin for energy before my 8:30am run, my first official half marathon clinic. I was a bit nervous because my cold has made me feel a bit crappy all weekend, and I was worried I'd be suffocating on phlegm during the run. However, by the time I got myself to the CBC building, I was feeling okay.
The group is about 12 people and a variety of running levels/experiences. From what I could tell, based on the people with whom I chatted, it seems I'm the most "advanced" runner (although I could be wrong, who knows). There's a 60 year old woman in the group who has never run before, and I think it's so exciting that she's doing this training!
I missed the first session last week when the group started with an 8.5km run. Today we did 9km. Next week, we'll do 10km. I got a copy of the training manual, which seems quite comprehensive and I'm anxious to dig into it. Our instructor told us we should aim for 4-5 runs per week. Three runs is a bare minimum, he said.
This morning was a great day for running; there was little wind, not too cold, and very sunny. My only complaint is that my IT band started to kill about 6km into the run. I'll have to monitor that. It probably means I need new shoes, which I've been intending to get anyway and now the pain just makes the task that much more urgent.
I was running at the front of the pack with two others, and I found that my pace was slower then when I run on my own, which was both frustrating and fine. Frustrating, because I love pushing myself and I'm used to my natural gait/pace and I want to train within a particular speed zone. Fine, because I could still talk with my fellow group members, and reduce the risk of running out of energy. There were a lot of other runners out and it was fun to pass enthusiastic groups who would shout "hello" and "good morning". And I felt really good being out there so early and doing something so satisfying. I mean, even if I accomplished nothing the rest of the day, at least I accomplished that one 9km run! In short, I had a great time and am keen for next week! Now I need to look at the training schedule and plan out my runs for the week!
The group is about 12 people and a variety of running levels/experiences. From what I could tell, based on the people with whom I chatted, it seems I'm the most "advanced" runner (although I could be wrong, who knows). There's a 60 year old woman in the group who has never run before, and I think it's so exciting that she's doing this training!
I missed the first session last week when the group started with an 8.5km run. Today we did 9km. Next week, we'll do 10km. I got a copy of the training manual, which seems quite comprehensive and I'm anxious to dig into it. Our instructor told us we should aim for 4-5 runs per week. Three runs is a bare minimum, he said.
This morning was a great day for running; there was little wind, not too cold, and very sunny. My only complaint is that my IT band started to kill about 6km into the run. I'll have to monitor that. It probably means I need new shoes, which I've been intending to get anyway and now the pain just makes the task that much more urgent.
I was running at the front of the pack with two others, and I found that my pace was slower then when I run on my own, which was both frustrating and fine. Frustrating, because I love pushing myself and I'm used to my natural gait/pace and I want to train within a particular speed zone. Fine, because I could still talk with my fellow group members, and reduce the risk of running out of energy. There were a lot of other runners out and it was fun to pass enthusiastic groups who would shout "hello" and "good morning". And I felt really good being out there so early and doing something so satisfying. I mean, even if I accomplished nothing the rest of the day, at least I accomplished that one 9km run! In short, I had a great time and am keen for next week! Now I need to look at the training schedule and plan out my runs for the week!
Friday, March 2, 2007
Brief NYC debrief
Ice pellets; gusting winds; snowfall warning….this is a gloomy Friday. I’ve managed to catch a cold that has progressed with the week, and today, all I want is to be at home in my cozies. Instead, I had to be at work today to pack up my office (we’re losing our closed offices, boohoo! We’re being moved to cubicles since our closed offices are against Treasury Board standards – ridiculous!). I also have to chair a Very Important Call today. So no absentee-ism, although I’m sure my colleagues would appreciate it. It’s embarrassing when I hack all over the place and see people cringe, like on the bus this morning.
Last week, I went to New York City to help a friend move her sister-in-law’s things back to Canada. The trip was perfectly timed as I had been yearning for a little adventure to spice up this long stretch of time between Christmas and Easter. And what a fun time we had! We took the red eye bus last Friday night, where we indulged in copious amounts of Bulk Barn candies while having a proper catch-up. We slept most of the way, and arrived in the great Big Apple at 6am. We proceeded to our Queen’s Hotel, carting our 4 gigantic suitcases (to bring back the sister’s things), crashed for 2 hours and then went to the estranged husband’s apartment to move a TON of bags/suitcases. We spent the rest of the day in Manhattan shopping, walking and eating great food. That night, we returned to the hotel to pack all the possessions into the suitcases. Unfortunately there was so much stuff, that we ended up with six huge, bulging suitcases to carry between us two tiny people. Trying to maneuver the suitcases in the Port Authority, through customs and through the Montreal bus station was so ridiculous and stressful, that I collapsed in a fit of giggles each time. It really was a sight, and thank goodness we kept our sense of humor. We finally got back to O-town around 2am exhausted. But we had such a good time, and I was so glad I could help my friend out, as the whole situation was pretty stressful for her.
It was so fun to be back in NYC; last time I was there, I was 16 years old and more interested in the cute Irish boys staying in our hotel than in seeing the sights (such a silly, stupid girl in hindsight, haha!). So much was as I remembered it, although Times Square has seen some change. I can’t get over the number of McDonalds I saw – it was like Starbucks in Vancouver, they’re just everywhere! We met some very friendly New Yorkers, which was such a pleasantry especially in the Port Authority with our gaggle of bags – we couldn’t have made it without the friendly Red Cap.
This week, I’ve been fighting the sugar cravings, which were set off by the Bulk Barn candy binges on the Greyhound. It’s a daily struggle, and most days this week, I’ve caved to temptation (damn that jujube candy bowl on my colleague’s desk!!). And last night, I made a banana sour cream pie – but that was more to use up our sour cream than to satisfy my sweet-tooth – which doesn’t improve the situation.
With this nasty weather, I hope my first half marathon clinic on Sunday morning goes okay. I can’t fathom running on slippery, snowy sidewalks in running shoes.
Have a lovely weekend!
Last week, I went to New York City to help a friend move her sister-in-law’s things back to Canada. The trip was perfectly timed as I had been yearning for a little adventure to spice up this long stretch of time between Christmas and Easter. And what a fun time we had! We took the red eye bus last Friday night, where we indulged in copious amounts of Bulk Barn candies while having a proper catch-up. We slept most of the way, and arrived in the great Big Apple at 6am. We proceeded to our Queen’s Hotel, carting our 4 gigantic suitcases (to bring back the sister’s things), crashed for 2 hours and then went to the estranged husband’s apartment to move a TON of bags/suitcases. We spent the rest of the day in Manhattan shopping, walking and eating great food. That night, we returned to the hotel to pack all the possessions into the suitcases. Unfortunately there was so much stuff, that we ended up with six huge, bulging suitcases to carry between us two tiny people. Trying to maneuver the suitcases in the Port Authority, through customs and through the Montreal bus station was so ridiculous and stressful, that I collapsed in a fit of giggles each time. It really was a sight, and thank goodness we kept our sense of humor. We finally got back to O-town around 2am exhausted. But we had such a good time, and I was so glad I could help my friend out, as the whole situation was pretty stressful for her.
It was so fun to be back in NYC; last time I was there, I was 16 years old and more interested in the cute Irish boys staying in our hotel than in seeing the sights (such a silly, stupid girl in hindsight, haha!). So much was as I remembered it, although Times Square has seen some change. I can’t get over the number of McDonalds I saw – it was like Starbucks in Vancouver, they’re just everywhere! We met some very friendly New Yorkers, which was such a pleasantry especially in the Port Authority with our gaggle of bags – we couldn’t have made it without the friendly Red Cap.
This week, I’ve been fighting the sugar cravings, which were set off by the Bulk Barn candy binges on the Greyhound. It’s a daily struggle, and most days this week, I’ve caved to temptation (damn that jujube candy bowl on my colleague’s desk!!). And last night, I made a banana sour cream pie – but that was more to use up our sour cream than to satisfy my sweet-tooth – which doesn’t improve the situation.
With this nasty weather, I hope my first half marathon clinic on Sunday morning goes okay. I can’t fathom running on slippery, snowy sidewalks in running shoes.
Have a lovely weekend!
Wednesday, February 28, 2007
Del-i-c-ious snack that you HAVE to try!!
I made these Granola Chews tonight, and they are SO GOOD!! If you like Nature Valley Trail Mix Bars, you will love these...'cause they're even better!
1/4 - 1/3 C. butter
1/2 C. honey
1/2 C. each raisins & unsweetened grated coconut
1 C. coarsely chopped nuts (almonds, walnuts, or pecans)
1/2 tsp salt
In saucepan, stir butter & honey on low heat until melted and blended.
Remove from heat and add remaining ingredients, mix well. Spread into an ungreased 8 x 8 inch baking pan. Bake at 350 F for about 25 minutes until set.
I pulled these out of the oven about an hour ago, and we've already eaten about half the pan - they are that yummy & addictive. Enjoy!!
1/4 - 1/3 C. butter
1/2 C. honey
1/2 C. each raisins & unsweetened grated coconut
1 C. coarsely chopped nuts (almonds, walnuts, or pecans)
1/2 tsp salt
In saucepan, stir butter & honey on low heat until melted and blended.
Remove from heat and add remaining ingredients, mix well. Spread into an ungreased 8 x 8 inch baking pan. Bake at 350 F for about 25 minutes until set.
I pulled these out of the oven about an hour ago, and we've already eaten about half the pan - they are that yummy & addictive. Enjoy!!
Tuesday, February 27, 2007
That's it, I commit!
This afternoon, I am fully charged with a sense of renewal, excitement and energy! Today’s sunshine and mild temperatures are a powerful intoxicant to my weakened system, and for that, I am truly thankful.
For several years now, a personal goal of mine has been to complete a half-marathon. Plagued with self-doubt, fear and lack of 100% dedication, I have put it off. This year, though, the niggling in my brain has been getting more irritating to a point where I simply don’t want to let myself down; I want to prove it to myself that I can do it!! What initially gave me the push to go for it this year was the call for applications for CBC’s Gotta Run weekly segment. As some of you know, I sent in an application to be part of a 12-member group that trains for the Ottawa ING half marathon in May as a tv crew follows the group’s progress. Unsurprisingly, I was not selected from the 500+ applicants, and for a week or two, I let my goal slip from consciousness.
A few weeks later, I got an email from the CBC inviting me to participate in a special Running Room clinic organized just for those 488 applicants who weren’t selected for the group. I hummed and haahed about registering, because once I registered – that was it, I’d be committed. Well, after a few days, I sucked it up and registered. And now, to ensure complete commitment and to reassure myself that I have support, I am telling people I’m doing this. No backing out now!
BUT – today! – with this incredible warm, mild sun shining in my face, I finally feel thrilled at the prospect of accomplishing this goal! I am excited to join in the Running Room group run tomorrow (it’s only 3km, haha!) and to finally get this ball rolling. I know there will be hard days that will challenge me physically and mentally, but today, I don’t care about that. If I can climb an endless Himalayan mountain for 7 days straight, I can certainly train 3 months for a 21.1 km race. Besides, I’m already running 15km during my weekly long runs, so I’m ahead of the game! (I think my biggest challenge will be running outdoors in the winter…can’t say I’m a fan of those artic winds blasting my face and numbing my joints).
Plus, tonight I begin Level III in boxing. I am so looking forward to progressing to this level…time for more of a challenge!
Bring it on, I say! I am ready for spring; I am ready for new important, personal challenges; and I am ready to commit!
And I have decided to revamp the name of this blog, seeing as there is a keen lack of "he said" on the site. I have decided to make it my own. So stayed tuned on it's new name....just have to figure that out....
For several years now, a personal goal of mine has been to complete a half-marathon. Plagued with self-doubt, fear and lack of 100% dedication, I have put it off. This year, though, the niggling in my brain has been getting more irritating to a point where I simply don’t want to let myself down; I want to prove it to myself that I can do it!! What initially gave me the push to go for it this year was the call for applications for CBC’s Gotta Run weekly segment. As some of you know, I sent in an application to be part of a 12-member group that trains for the Ottawa ING half marathon in May as a tv crew follows the group’s progress. Unsurprisingly, I was not selected from the 500+ applicants, and for a week or two, I let my goal slip from consciousness.
A few weeks later, I got an email from the CBC inviting me to participate in a special Running Room clinic organized just for those 488 applicants who weren’t selected for the group. I hummed and haahed about registering, because once I registered – that was it, I’d be committed. Well, after a few days, I sucked it up and registered. And now, to ensure complete commitment and to reassure myself that I have support, I am telling people I’m doing this. No backing out now!
BUT – today! – with this incredible warm, mild sun shining in my face, I finally feel thrilled at the prospect of accomplishing this goal! I am excited to join in the Running Room group run tomorrow (it’s only 3km, haha!) and to finally get this ball rolling. I know there will be hard days that will challenge me physically and mentally, but today, I don’t care about that. If I can climb an endless Himalayan mountain for 7 days straight, I can certainly train 3 months for a 21.1 km race. Besides, I’m already running 15km during my weekly long runs, so I’m ahead of the game! (I think my biggest challenge will be running outdoors in the winter…can’t say I’m a fan of those artic winds blasting my face and numbing my joints).
Plus, tonight I begin Level III in boxing. I am so looking forward to progressing to this level…time for more of a challenge!
Bring it on, I say! I am ready for spring; I am ready for new important, personal challenges; and I am ready to commit!
And I have decided to revamp the name of this blog, seeing as there is a keen lack of "he said" on the site. I have decided to make it my own. So stayed tuned on it's new name....just have to figure that out....
Wednesday, February 21, 2007
A big sheet of ice 'neath my feet
Every Canadian, or at the very least every Ottawan, should skate the Rideau Canal. There is nothing like it.
I laced up my skates last night for the first time this year. It was a beautiful evening – not too cold, no wind, and not too many people on the ice. The first skate of the year is always a little shaky, a little uncoordinated as I try to find my balance.
I love gliding along, listening to a multitude of skate blades slice crisply through the ice, seeing people huddled around picnic tables eating their beavertails with numbed hands and unsteady feet, and enjoying the skate for the unique cultural experience that it is.
I also get a kick when I see people around the city carrying skates because you know exactly where they are going or where they are coming from; in what other city do you see so many people carrying around skates?
Today was an absolutely gorgeous sunny, mild day and I laced up again during my lunch hour. I didn’t skate the length of the canal like last night due to time constraints, but still had an invigorating skate. People of all skills and abilities skating around….sun reflecting off the ice, blinding me….the wind on my cheeks….ahh, such freedom!
I laced up my skates last night for the first time this year. It was a beautiful evening – not too cold, no wind, and not too many people on the ice. The first skate of the year is always a little shaky, a little uncoordinated as I try to find my balance.
I love gliding along, listening to a multitude of skate blades slice crisply through the ice, seeing people huddled around picnic tables eating their beavertails with numbed hands and unsteady feet, and enjoying the skate for the unique cultural experience that it is.
I also get a kick when I see people around the city carrying skates because you know exactly where they are going or where they are coming from; in what other city do you see so many people carrying around skates?
Today was an absolutely gorgeous sunny, mild day and I laced up again during my lunch hour. I didn’t skate the length of the canal like last night due to time constraints, but still had an invigorating skate. People of all skills and abilities skating around….sun reflecting off the ice, blinding me….the wind on my cheeks….ahh, such freedom!
Tuesday, February 20, 2007
Monday, February 19, 2007
Quotes of note
Here are a few interesting quotes I've come across recently that I thought I'd share.
You have two hands. One to help yourself, the second to help others - Anonymous
Resolve to be thyself; and know that he who finds himself, loses his misery - Matthew Arnold
Nothing makes us more productive than the last minute - Anonymous
If there is any kindness I can show, or any good thing I can do to any fellow human being, let me do it now, and not defer or neglect it, as I shall not pass this way again - William Penn
And this one by Mark Twain particularly speaks to me, inspires me, moves me -
Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbour. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. - Mark Twain
You have two hands. One to help yourself, the second to help others - Anonymous
Resolve to be thyself; and know that he who finds himself, loses his misery - Matthew Arnold
Nothing makes us more productive than the last minute - Anonymous
If there is any kindness I can show, or any good thing I can do to any fellow human being, let me do it now, and not defer or neglect it, as I shall not pass this way again - William Penn
And this one by Mark Twain particularly speaks to me, inspires me, moves me -
Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbour. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. - Mark Twain
The monkey on my back
It's the start of another week; another cold morning. What's nice now, though, is that the sun is rising earlier and setting later. I can't believe how much of a difference that little bit of extra light makes on my sense of well-being.
This morning I am tired, uninspired and droopy. I don't know what's wrong; I didn't feel so great last week either. This morning, I think the feeling stems from being very tired and also that 'hangover' feeling after pigging out on junk food. Yesterday, I fell off the wagon, so to speak, of our new diet, and maaan, does the effect just knock me out - mentally, physically, emotionally. The guilt, self-loathing, and sense of worthlessness is just as intense as it always was. And now that I've been free of that mental punishment for about a month now, I realize just how liberating it is to just feel good about myself, just to 'be' and not suffocate myself with nagging, negative self-talk.
*****
Saturday we had friends over for dinner, so we got our apt tidied, and spent the afternoon getting the meal ready. Our apt looks really nice right now, very cozy and homey. If only we could keep it that way - clutter free!! Anyway, we prepared a very yummy meal and had a nice evening. Next weekend, I'm going to New York City with another friend of mine and I'm quite looking forward to the adventure. We're bussing down, which we both agree will be tortorous. We're arming ourselves for the trip with Gravol, ear plugs, eye masks, and chocolate.
This morning I am tired, uninspired and droopy. I don't know what's wrong; I didn't feel so great last week either. This morning, I think the feeling stems from being very tired and also that 'hangover' feeling after pigging out on junk food. Yesterday, I fell off the wagon, so to speak, of our new diet, and maaan, does the effect just knock me out - mentally, physically, emotionally. The guilt, self-loathing, and sense of worthlessness is just as intense as it always was. And now that I've been free of that mental punishment for about a month now, I realize just how liberating it is to just feel good about myself, just to 'be' and not suffocate myself with nagging, negative self-talk.
*****
Saturday we had friends over for dinner, so we got our apt tidied, and spent the afternoon getting the meal ready. Our apt looks really nice right now, very cozy and homey. If only we could keep it that way - clutter free!! Anyway, we prepared a very yummy meal and had a nice evening. Next weekend, I'm going to New York City with another friend of mine and I'm quite looking forward to the adventure. We're bussing down, which we both agree will be tortorous. We're arming ourselves for the trip with Gravol, ear plugs, eye masks, and chocolate.
Wednesday, February 14, 2007
Happy Valentine's Day!
"All things respond to the love and care you give them...in their own time...and in their own way. Believe in love."
I thought this was a nice quote; it's today's inspirational quote on my desk calendar.
Happy Valentine's Day!
I thought this was a nice quote; it's today's inspirational quote on my desk calendar.
Happy Valentine's Day!
Saturday, February 3, 2007
A brand new day!
Mark and I have been taking an extremely interesting health course that examines all components that affect our health and well-being and how they impact us ie: nutrition, exercise, stress, sleep, digestion etc. Based on the things we have learned in the course and on reading the book on which the course is based, we have overhauled our diets. Mark especially. We are eating organic as much as possible, eating out less, reducing the grains we eat (like bread), and cutting out sugar as much as possible.
I'm leaving out the important "why" for some of these choices. But let if suffice to say that we both feel really good these days; healthy, energized, happy. And food has become exciting again! We're trying out lots of new recipes, particularly fish like haddock, orange ruffy, tilapia, and sushi-grade tuna (which we had tonight - so good!). And food even tastes better - I mean, free range eggs taste far superior to regular eggs, and they're bigger too.
My baking hobby is taking a serious hit with this overhaul since baking is filled with butter, fat, sugar, etc etc. However, I've found a few recipes that use nut flour instead of grain flour, no sugar and little fat. But those two recipes are gonna get old fast.
I also find that instead of craving jujubes and cookies, I am now developing a dependence upon honey and fruits like pineapple and mango (which can't be good! the cravings, I mean). Cutting out bread was a good thing for me, as I actually don't feel that good when I eat bread. Sometimes I miss my morning toast, but overall, I actually don't miss it that much! When I pass bread in the grocery store, I glance at it fondly, nostalgically, like an old friend that is still dear to me but that I've had to say goodbye to for awhile, but will revisit briefly, fleetingly, again down the road (say, when I go to an Indian restaurant & have naan).
My biggest obstacle is trying to get adequate sleep. According to the author of the book, we should be in bed, relaxed, before 10:30pm. This is a challenge for me, but a challenge that is well worth the undertaking, as I have been sleep deprived since, probably, the age of 18. I swear lack of sleep has aged me well beyond my 28 years....that's probably why I have the memory retention of an 80 year old (no offence meant to anyone). And ironically, I'm staying up way too late writing this blog.
On that note, I'm off to bed.
I'm leaving out the important "why" for some of these choices. But let if suffice to say that we both feel really good these days; healthy, energized, happy. And food has become exciting again! We're trying out lots of new recipes, particularly fish like haddock, orange ruffy, tilapia, and sushi-grade tuna (which we had tonight - so good!). And food even tastes better - I mean, free range eggs taste far superior to regular eggs, and they're bigger too.
My baking hobby is taking a serious hit with this overhaul since baking is filled with butter, fat, sugar, etc etc. However, I've found a few recipes that use nut flour instead of grain flour, no sugar and little fat. But those two recipes are gonna get old fast.
I also find that instead of craving jujubes and cookies, I am now developing a dependence upon honey and fruits like pineapple and mango (which can't be good! the cravings, I mean). Cutting out bread was a good thing for me, as I actually don't feel that good when I eat bread. Sometimes I miss my morning toast, but overall, I actually don't miss it that much! When I pass bread in the grocery store, I glance at it fondly, nostalgically, like an old friend that is still dear to me but that I've had to say goodbye to for awhile, but will revisit briefly, fleetingly, again down the road (say, when I go to an Indian restaurant & have naan).
My biggest obstacle is trying to get adequate sleep. According to the author of the book, we should be in bed, relaxed, before 10:30pm. This is a challenge for me, but a challenge that is well worth the undertaking, as I have been sleep deprived since, probably, the age of 18. I swear lack of sleep has aged me well beyond my 28 years....that's probably why I have the memory retention of an 80 year old (no offence meant to anyone). And ironically, I'm staying up way too late writing this blog.
On that note, I'm off to bed.
Wednesday, January 17, 2007
On being a Rocky virgin
Last night, Mark and I went to see the new Rocky movie with our friend Bex, with whom we box. It was my first time watching a Rocky movie, and I was pretty excited since I can now appreciate boxing for the athleticism, skill and stamina required rather than seeing it as merely a violent beating.
My only previous experience with Rocky has been listening to Eye of the Tiger and glancing at the movie posters on the walls of our boxing training class (one poster is of Rocky at the speed bag, for which our coach told us not to mimic Rocky's form because it is so bad). So I am completely unfamiliar with Rocky's story line, musical score included.
In this new film, once things finally get rolling and Rocky's training like a fool, this awesome soundtrack comes on that sounds kinda familiar, like maybe I heard it once before somewhere. Since it has a distinctly '70s/'80s sound to it, I figure it must be a carryover from the previous films. So I lean over to Mark, and ask him, "is this song from the original movie?". In the dark theatre, it looked like he gave me an incredulous/scathing look, and says, "This is the Rocky theme!!!". I reply, "Oh, I thought the theme was Eye of the Tiger." Later, Rebecca tells me she is embarrassed for me for having asked that question.
If I ever go to Philly, I'm bringing some grey sweats with me, I'm gonna run up those stairs, turn around at the top, raise my fist in the air and yell, "Stellllaaaa!! Stellllaaaa!!!!" Man, that Rocky sure loved his wife.
My only previous experience with Rocky has been listening to Eye of the Tiger and glancing at the movie posters on the walls of our boxing training class (one poster is of Rocky at the speed bag, for which our coach told us not to mimic Rocky's form because it is so bad). So I am completely unfamiliar with Rocky's story line, musical score included.
In this new film, once things finally get rolling and Rocky's training like a fool, this awesome soundtrack comes on that sounds kinda familiar, like maybe I heard it once before somewhere. Since it has a distinctly '70s/'80s sound to it, I figure it must be a carryover from the previous films. So I lean over to Mark, and ask him, "is this song from the original movie?". In the dark theatre, it looked like he gave me an incredulous/scathing look, and says, "This is the Rocky theme!!!". I reply, "Oh, I thought the theme was Eye of the Tiger." Later, Rebecca tells me she is embarrassed for me for having asked that question.
If I ever go to Philly, I'm bringing some grey sweats with me, I'm gonna run up those stairs, turn around at the top, raise my fist in the air and yell, "Stellllaaaa!! Stellllaaaa!!!!" Man, that Rocky sure loved his wife.
Wednesday, January 3, 2007
New year, new words
National Post's new vocabulary for '07:
"Washing your undies"
Definition: Blogging about the most tedious, minute, personal non-events.
"Washing your undies"
Definition: Blogging about the most tedious, minute, personal non-events.
Tuesday, January 2, 2007
Holiday hangover
Back to work today after a relaxing week-long holiday at home. I am a bit jet-lagged and am fighting to keep my peepers open and to shake off that depression that follows a holiday. My head aches *sigh* It must be my holiday hangover - too much sweets, not enough sleep, zero exercise, a waistline jiggle.
My flight on the 22nd was interesting. In short, it was 2 1/2 hours late in departing due to bad weather (freezing rain). In fact, I'm lucky we left at all considering two planes had slid off the runway and the airport was on the verge of being closed. Needless to say, I missed my connecting flight to Kamloops and spent the night in a Vancouver hotel (actually, I spent only five hours at the hotel, hardly worth the nearly $100 incurred cost). I arrived in Kamloops at 7am the next morning, and my luggage arrived the following day.
But despite that rocky start, I had a great time. Met my sister's fiance's family; threw my sister a stagette; visited with an old high school friend; and spent some quality time with my parents.
Tonight we're going to pick up another foster cat, so that should help get me back into the swing of things here.
Well, I'm short on stories today, so I'm heading off to the gym for some much needed post-mincetart-and-other-sweets-eating exercise. I hope my gym shorts still fit.....
My flight on the 22nd was interesting. In short, it was 2 1/2 hours late in departing due to bad weather (freezing rain). In fact, I'm lucky we left at all considering two planes had slid off the runway and the airport was on the verge of being closed. Needless to say, I missed my connecting flight to Kamloops and spent the night in a Vancouver hotel (actually, I spent only five hours at the hotel, hardly worth the nearly $100 incurred cost). I arrived in Kamloops at 7am the next morning, and my luggage arrived the following day.
But despite that rocky start, I had a great time. Met my sister's fiance's family; threw my sister a stagette; visited with an old high school friend; and spent some quality time with my parents.
Tonight we're going to pick up another foster cat, so that should help get me back into the swing of things here.
Well, I'm short on stories today, so I'm heading off to the gym for some much needed post-mincetart-and-other-sweets-eating exercise. I hope my gym shorts still fit.....
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